the AntiBiography in my head

NOTE: not all views/BS/ramblings in this blog are factual...jus'sayin'...

TRENDING NOW!!!!TRENDING NOW!!!!

Sarah Palin  (someone needs to duct tape her mouth shut...jus sayin)
Aung San Suu Kyi (?)
NFL Injury Report (no comment)
Thanksgiving Car...  (is a turkey?)(...no idea what this is about)
Randy Moss (again...he needs to shut his mouth as well)
Madoff Auction (all money received goes to charity)
Influenza (got shots?)
Pumpkin Pie (looks like babyshit)  Tina Fey (oddly hot)

     i started this blog cuz i like to write. ...little did i realize that it would be so hard. to come up with something to say three times a week was hard enough. to come up with something every day...whew!!!  that is WORK! but it is fun work...
     this blog is like my AntiBiography...i am more than the sum of its parts, but also less than parts of the sum...or just so DamnFullofShit that I need an outlet...can't spend all my time at a bar BS-ing with the other drunks...and now that Michigan has a superdrunk law..
     I have to be very carefull with this new law...I am a SuperDrunk. or mebe a  drunk that is SuperFun. They can't just bust into my house and arrest me for being a SuperFunDrunk, can they? even if i have the keys in my car? which I leave there alot, cuz that way I do not lose them.
     We had  a KeyFob that had a clapper and it would find the keys for us. Bad idea. Clapping is  away to get the dogs attention. and the keys attention too. then chaos ensues. got rid of the clapper thingy...

    I know that work and fun are not often used in the same sentence, especially by me, but it is fun writing this blog. and I definitely do not find work fun...so am i just lying to myself or do I come up with a new word to describe what writing this blog is? Or do I accept that some times work is fun? Or do I bore you with a  conversation that should be inside my head and not with you all...

    combined words: 

fwork or wfun...

both look pretty stupid...

not going anywhere with this..

    anyway

    I am not what you think.. or i am what you think...to most of you (over half my followers are personal friends) wtf? why would they read this? truth be told i am not sure they do.. I am a guy that you know...I actually have one friend that refuses to read my blog, because he thinks he hears all this crap long before you do...However, I come up with new crap everyday and I do not see him everyday, so he is missing out...and when I am rich and famous from being dis.cov.ered. because of this stupid funny idiotic blog... he will be sorry...

you know today will be the day he finally reads it

and he will know who he is ..

f- him... .I can write this blog for you...

the sad thing is he is a great source of fodder..

but if he doesn't see it it is like talking behind his back...

i would rather insult you to your face...

or via texting

     I am not a role model  I know. I know. WTF B? Did you think ANYONE would consider you a role model? yeah I kinda did, actually...but i think i was drunk at the time and....I have tried to keep this blog almost always PG-13..that HAS got to count for SOMEthing...

see what we mean , B? drunk? seriously?

drunks are not role models...duh!  

i actually do not drink NEARLY as much as i talk about it...

i do like to drink tho'
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT!!!
and drinking and driving...
(after VoHo...i am much
more cognizntifull
of the dangers...)
please do not drink and drive!!!

        This will prolly come as a surprise to a lot of you... i cuss...a.lot. yeah...I do have a sailors mouth...and more correctly drunken sailor...EvilTwin comes out a lot...but I do edit most of his crap and then he just pouts and writes his own BS...      

       I do not like ketchup. on anything. at. all. Hate is prolly not too strong a word when it comes to catsup, kechup, ketchup...anyway you spell it I am not gonna like it. come to think of it I like Poupon mustard over yellow mustard and real Mayo over Miracle Whip...so mebbe it is a sweetness thing.. mebbe I am  a sourpuss...

      I love Tabasco sauce. and other hot sauces...but Tabasco is my FAVO...particular poison...I put it on or in EV.ER.Y.THI.ING... Even when I  make Jell-o I put Tabasco sauce in it...I do not like the other hot sauces as well. and I have tried a bunch...

okay, i may not really put tabasco in Jell-o...

    

  I do not  always say things that are politically correct. Sometimes I actually say things that are mildy inflamatory...but just some times...other times I say things that are wrong..just .plain. wrong...

      Sometimes I make up words. sometimes I combine words and a lot of time I mispeell words. I hate asking norman the speeelchekjler to chen=ck my woerik..Oh and yes that is how I type, so you can see the amount of work that is involved in one of these long rambling posts about basically nothing...  

    this is the regimine I go thru on every blog...not really...I do not go thru all these things...but you could have guessed that, right? I just  write what poops pops into my head and then refine it to the serious art form it is... 

seriously, Bruce? you expect us to believe there is refinment going on?

 like  you actually edit this shit?

OFFS...

of course i do

can you imagine how bad this would be if i did not?

so then here i am writing this little blog

and tyring to remain true to my beliefs

and stuff and all that...

    sometimes when I get all done I re-read my ramblings...and sometimes what I read even surprises me...sometimes I do not remember tyPing certain words or phrases...and think ? where did that come from...and then I remember....from that other dimension...the won wun one where I am king of the world!

    but most times i dont even edit this drivel, i just hit send...

oh and BTW i am not doing super sports sunday this week...i had the fewest hit in weeks when i rambled on last weekend more correctly sunday, about sports so we'll see if it just sunday thing, a sports thing or a me thing...

have a grat day! er i mena mean Great! DFAY

DAY!