all the cool kids!

you are getting very sleepy...when i snap my fingers you will follow this blog! leave tasty comments! and check out my OTHER blogs! Bruce's Evil Twin stupid stuff I see and hear The Dreamodeling Guy dreamodeling! The Guy Book The Guy Book


the blogdog blog

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Saturday stupidity 5 7 11

TRENDING NOOOOOO!!!! TRENDING NO!
1.      Robin Quivers (Robin Quitters?)
2.      Amanda Knox (knoxxed up?)
3.      Al-Qaida statement (whatever, fuckers…don’t be hatin’)
4.      Jillian Michaels (loser)
5.      Flower delivery (oh yeah, tomorrow is mother’s day..FUCK!)
6.      Jennifer Aniston (perfume signings)
7.      Meteor shower (end of days, people, end of days)
8.      Mel Gibson (starring with the beaver?)
9.      Bin Laden hideout (oh…really…looks like the Al Qaeda have themselves a fort…and you wonder what happened to all those appliance boxes)
10.  Commodities ( buy pork bellies NOW!) (oh wait…sell..sell..sell…)(no… buy . buy .buy!)




admittedly i am not a fan of weddings...


source


AND this head bling is....

well, fuck....
i.
am.
at.
a.
loss.

Just Another Dorkyhat In Paradise!


Thursday, May 5, 2011

thursday thinking 5 5 11

Editors note:  I just noticed I have 96 BIA...96... 69... whatthesuckever...


The other day, I wrote a rather impassioned little blog on my EvilTwin Blog. It is not the typical just ranting cuss fest, and while there is a lot of cussing, it has a point. Many may not agree with me, and that is fine. Free speech and all that...Many of you follow both of these blogs.


Many great comments were spawned by this post: I particluarly liked what my friend Bushman had to say:  "It is a way of life that needs to die. Racism, religious fanatacism and oily black and green politics." 


Right on brother!  Stop by and say to Bushy....and bring beers!


TRENDING NO!!!!!TRENDING NOOOOOO!!!!!
1.      Fake Bin Laden links (seriously?)
2.      Kendra Wilkinson (in love…with herself)
3.      Al-Qaeda surrender (a song by Cheap Trick?)
4.      Internet kissing machine (oh that is soooo hot)
5.      Marie Osmond (getting re-married)
6.      Tony Romo (surprising retires…stating that it is too tough to be the qb in dullass)
7.      Zsa Zsa Gabor (dies…nope but has pneumonia buy the flowers while they are cheap…jus sayin…she is like a bazillion years old)
8.      Medicare ( will not pay for Zsa Zsa’s medical)
9.      Oil futures (buy low sell high...or just get high and think about what you coulda done 30 yrs ago)
10.  Tom Cruise (is getting old)

this could be a good idea...
or
a total disaster....





happy cinco de drunko!


Just Another Drunk  Day In Paradise!

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

tUcKeR 2sDaY overlord edition!



this is me
at six months
i am playin!


whatcha doin?


editors note...
Actual conversation on Sunday:
Tucker: Whatcha doin' daddy?
Daddy: Writing a post.
T: 'bout what?
D:  'Bout how I am the Overlord!
T: You ARE the alpha dog , Daddy!
T: you are not an overlord! silly daddy!
T: let's go play!
T: right now!
T: lickity lickity!
D: Tucker, I have to finish picking people to give this to.
T: I wanna give it out too!
D: But you did not win it.
T: Yes I did, Daddy, as part of our agreement, in blogdogblog summit 2011, Iz getsd to write 25% or 33% of the stuffs we write...
chew 
chew 
chew
on that daddy!
D: woofever, TuckMonster, woofever


i relented...it was far easier than coming up with three more links while a puppy is pulling on your sleeve and trying to climb on your lap and hitting the65484646478 number pad...


its 2sDaY
its's tUcKeR


i am tucker! i am a puppy! i am the world dogmanator!




I AM THE OVERLORD! 
WORLD DOGAMNATOR!
THANKS JEWELS!
world dogmanation!

the rules for this award are here, as dogmanator, i will do as little as possible. working like a dog...
woofever! tehe tehe


i am the PuppyMaster


                                       TRENDING NOoOoO!!!!TRENDING NOOO!!!!


1.      Nicole Scherzingererer (what kinda name is that?)

2.      Bin Laden wives (really? This is trending? Fuck me freddy)
3.      Brooke Mueller (pasta girl)
4.      Kelly Ripa (her pants off)
5.      Credit card fraud (declined)
6.      SEAL Team Six (will be a made for TV movie next month, you heard it here first)
7.      Jimmy Fallon (type “jimmy fallon whip my hair”)
8.      Fuel-efficient cars (how about not driving your kids two blocks to the fucking bus stop)
9.      Anthony Hopkins (starring as OBL in the above mentioned movie…don’t do it, it’s a career killer)
10.  Geronimo (indian word for jump?)


this award has rules...
woofever!
dogmanation starts...now!

three things i would change! as the PUPPYMASTER

1. all dog food would be bacon flavored and it would not give me the runnypoops.

2. mr. squirrel and mrs. bunny and abner kittycat would love to play with me. all.the.time.

3. every morning everyone would get a good belly scratch and  lickity lickity! and then take a nap!

i am tucker!~ i am  puppy...world dogmanation!

the PuppyMaster!

i am passing this on to:

skippymom at I make soap she is the bestest skippiest mommiest in the world and she told daddy to give me a fb page and he did! she will rule with a toilet paper fist! just ask spot!

MR SQUIRREL!

MRS BUNNY!

GOTTA GO!
playin
playin
playin

so, yet again, I have to pick up the slack...that puppy!

i will also give this to:

Yandie the goddess of pickles at Inspiration Strikes; in the knee caps I cannot wait to see what changes Yandie will make. Never short on opinions and always quick with the wit, this oughta be good!

StephanieC at Seriously Reeeally Seriously  Stephanie coined the term feyonce for her soon to be betrothed.  Hence the genius behind this will be stellar!

i believe they are both from Canada as well...

til next week, this is Daddy saying goodbye from Tucker...

its 2sDaY
its's tUcKeR


see you next week.
i will be funny
cuz i am cute
and i am a puppy!


Monday, May 2, 2011

jewels drops the gloves!

Today I have a very special Blog swap with the Lovely Jewels... And we are talking HOCKEY! Jewels and I are doing a blogcrushblogswap! Strap on the mask and throw on your sweater, and be ready to drop the gloves!
________________-----------------_______________----------------

It is playoff hockey time and I could think of nothing better than doing a blog swap with Bruce about hockey, fans, rivalries, and just how cool hockey fans are! Because Bruce is a sweetie he agreed to it and here I am, hanging with Tucker while his daddy is at my place (head over there to read his hockey post) and enjoying some puppy love while I talk about a sport I love. Life is good.

Hockey in Philadelphia is big (not as big as football but definitely rivals baseball) and it is one of my greatest passions. We are known as a blue collar, hard working, and hard playing town of loud, passionate, and intense fans. I couldn’t be prouder to be amongst them. That being said, we do not always have the best reputation.

A lot of people perceive Philadelphia fans as loud, obnoxious, rude, violent, and a host of other lovely terms. I’m here to say that sure, there are those among us who are ignorant and use horrid language but there are those kinds of fans everywhere. What you WILL find here are knowledgeable and passionate fans who will just as soon boo their own players for subpar performance as we will your team. We expect a lot of our team but we give them absolute love and support, unconditionally, like a family member. There will be times we are let down and upset but we bleed Orange and Black for them.

Should you come to Philly and wear a Penguins jersey? Probably not but you wouldn't go to a Dallas Cowgirls game in an Eagles jersey either. Some rivalries are deeply rooted and aren't gong anywhere soon. In truth, if a rival fan came to our stadium they may have a few heckles, mostly in good humor, but for the most part you are left alone. We respect your right to support inferior teams, I mean not everyone can be as stellar as Flyer's fans.

A Washington Post hockey writer wrote an inflammatory column about the Flyers fans during Washington/Flyers Playoffs in 2008. In the article (which has since been removed as all links I find for it are no longer active) he said, “The fans wore orange instead of the Capitals’ red, and many of the women and children looked as if they could work security for Megadeath.” This caused quite a stir in passionate Philadelphia but we got a lot of support. Check out this video.





We have a name for ourselves as a good hockey team but a team that doesn’t always play cleanly. We are freaking proud of that. Not the dirty hits or boarding but we will find you in the corners or with your head down and you will be checked, hard! We will drop the gloves, maybe more than the average team, but that is our style of play. It is that style of play that Philly fans have become accustomed to and love. My sister can be found at any given time screaming for blood (she’s evil like that). Let’s be honest with ourselves though…if you are a hockey fan you enjoy the fights too…you know you do! There is a time and place for it in the game. You are down a couple goals, a thug hits your skill player, a dirty hit went uncalled in a prior period, well then you best believe somebody is throwing down to even things up or get the crowd into the game.

Anyone who says that hockey is too violent or there is no place for fighting in hockey needs to go watch golf…hockey isn’t your grandma’s sport…it’s rough and that’s how we like it. Do I want to see players hurt? No. Do I want to see boarding, ever? Absolutely not! Any player will tell you that accidents happen, a temper gets a hold of you, or freak chance can lead to injuries and this can be said in any town for any team…Philly may be tough but we aren’t malicious.

As a hockey fan I love playoff hockey. First it means that you don’t have to face the hideous withdrawal of the end of hockey season and second it’s intense and amazing! There is nothing like playoff hockey. Four rounds of a best of 7 series that leaves one team hoisting Lord Stanley’s Cup; it just doesn’t get better than that. One of my favorite parts of playoff hockey here in Philadelphia is Kate Smith.  

Kate Smith (who died in 1986 at age 76) is a Philadelphia icon. She is the end all be all of “God Bless America” and I cry every single time I hear her sing it. Lauren Hart sings it now but occasionally they will merge Kate and Lauren and if they do then please believe our house goes crazy. We love Kate! The Flyers have an unbelievable record when her version of “God Bless America’ is played of 87 wins, 23 loses, and 4 ties (stats stopped in June 2010). Philly loves her (and Lauren Hart) and hearing them makes the game!


Personally, and it hurts to admit this, I am a hockey fan first and a Flyers fan second. Don’t get me wrong-you will NEVER see me cheer on another team (unless they are playing the Penguins) but I love the sport. What does this mean? It means that I will watch any hockey game on. I will appreciate the talent and strengths of other teams. I will covet other goalies, forwards, defensemen, and I will proudly and willingly admit their prowess at the game I love.

There are of course rivalries with teams that carry over to the fans. I will never like the Penguins or the Devils (the Rangers are pushing it). I would like to take this time to point out that the Penguins are golfing and the Flyers are still playing hockey...suck it Pittsburgh! These things cannot be helped. While I may admit that they have skilled players, the team as a whole, is my nemesis. It would be crossing enemy lines to ever like these teams. The thought of dating somebody that does is absolutely out of the question! (How Re married a Penguins fan I will never know!)

Do you want to know the one unifying thing in all hockey teams and fans (besides an incredible loathing of Sydney Crosby)? It’s that we love the game. No matter the team you play/cheer for; you love the game. It’s not every person who has good enough taste to love hockey the way I and my dear friend Bruce do, but it is certainly a lucky person. 

So until the Flyers face off against the Red Wings I will gladly congratulate Bruce on his teams wins and sympathize with any losses. I will comiserate with him over poor performances and rejoice in the good ones but when/if our teams face he had better watch out because I will take no prisoners! At the end of the series I will virtually shake his hand, as the players do, and congratulate him on a good series, but while the game is being played, on the ice, we are at war. LET'S GO FLYERS!

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Sunday 5 2 11 Snippets...the overlord award!

1700 age views last month...as lame as i was, i had more hits than any other month...looks like i will be even more disinterested in the blog next month and see what happens...


editors note: by now you may realize that i like to cuss. i drop the f-bomb. i will in this post, and gratuitously, i may add. i have invited my eviltwin to share in this post, a bit, leashed and tethered a bit but he is gonna have a bit of the spotlight...


also note: if i offend you, this is in fun...please take the tongue-in-cheek nature in which it is intended...or if you have to send me an email at askevilbruce@gmail.com to let me know how much you are disappointed...go head...if you must unfollow..that is also your prerogative.. but you will be sorry..very sorry...




I AM THE OVERLORD!
THANKS JEWELS!


yep! true dat!

me...moi...thebruce...brucie...bruce-y...Daddy...

an OVERLORD?

My EvilTwin? He may be an OVERLORD!

seriously?

The lovely Jewels, Flyers fan and all, whom will be doing a blogcrush blogswap with me soon...(I promise...) bestowed this wondrous award to me...

TRENDING NOoOoO!!!!TRENDING NOOO!!!!

1.      Nicolas Cage (next time he will listen to me, and not get so drunk)
2.      Tiger Woods (is a douchbag)
3.      Natalie Portman (hot)
4.      Kate Hudson (still very hot)
5.      Verizon (bites weenies)
6.      Hayden Panettiere (nudie pics here)
7.      Empire State Building (still cleaning off the sweat from King Kongs balls)
8.      Undercover Boss (yet another stupid show…glad it is being cancelled)
9.      Obama birth certificate (fucking give it a rest..the dumbald is fucking fool)
10.   Antidepressants (suck your will to die)

There of course are some rules, which I totally lifted from Jewels blog, cuz I can, being an OVERLORD! and all...


  1. List three things you would change if you were Overlord (KING OF THE WORLD)
  2. List ten blogs worthy of world domination (YEAH FUCK THAT! I'll give it to as many as I want)
  3. Contact them about their bastard child…er, I mean award. *those were Chanel’s words or maybe the wording of the award-not really sure... (whoever's words they are damn fucking funny)


1. There will no longer be any coverage of frivolous ridstupidarity such as royals getting married.
No amount of pompous and circumstance is needed.

Ever!

I find any wedding booooriiing...however, I really LOVE the ACBF (After Ceremony Beer Fest)...The news coverage devoted to this kind of fucktardedness is right up there with the inability to pin the rap on OJ...

Paint drying, golf, and Nastycar racing are more fun to watch, and I absofuckinglutly hate those three things...

Instead we will watch home videos of my last vacation to the Florida Keys...

See what I mean? Boooooorrrrrring....

It is just about the same thing...Except my family is not royalty. They are a royal pain in the ass, so is that the same thing?

And we are allowed to cuss and flip the bird at other drivers while filming and driving...and you know what else? The everglades go on for.ev.er. and I filmed ev.er.y. min.ute of it...

For many of us, my home videos would be boring...

Okay.

I get that.

See what I mean? Boring is not good...

Which is prolly why I have yet to convert them from tape to dvd...

2. All people that want to produce offspring will have to pass a competency test. Seriously. No fuckinfucktards making more fucktards...

You must be able to hold your temper when the situation warrants it. And carry on  conversation like an adult. And not just punch things or slap things cuz you are pissed...

Like a child.

Children do not need to have children...They need to grow up... I AM the OVERLORD!  just in case you forgot!

You must be able to  remain sober and alert during working hours. Stop doing things that prevent you from getting a real job. Cuz YOU need to be able to support your demonspawn...

You must be able to type in complete sentences, not just OMG, UR and LOL.

Seriously.

And dial a phone. Not just hit redial or the persons avatar... Actually push the buttons.

If you are too stupid to know what makes babies, then you are too stupid to breed. You can buy condoms at every fucking gas station in the free world...We used to have to go thru the embarrassment of buying them at the local drugstore...Where so and so's mom fucking worked!

Sheesh!

If my dog has a better command of the language than you, well, no baby license.

Jus' Sayin'

3. Anyone caught wearing BitchDrawers, or that god-awful, no belt, expose panties, hanging pants thing-y will BE. SHOT. ON. SITE! No fucking exceptions! Period!

Need I say more?

I will be passing it on to:

Rafa

the Bushman

id

Mynx-y

the Empress

Pencil Girl

Oilfield Trash

fuck going for ten...i am so done with this...

Just AnOverlord's Day In Paradise