Weekend Update...(updated, cuz i forgot some stuff)

...with Bruce and Tucker!

editors note: the things that are trending may or may not be real...i never really know myself...damn those self induced trances...

TRENDING NOOO!!!TRENDING NOOO!!!!!!!!

1.Kate Winslet (called me last night at 3 am)

2.she who will not be named (going to drop her surname…is there no end to her stupidity?)

3.Sylvester Stallone (getting re-married?)
4.Freida Pinto (staring in a new role)

5.NFL Draft 2011 (cancelled)

6.Rachel Zoe (prolly preggers, mebbe in a break up…I don’t giva damn)

7.Muffin top (sucks)

8.Bernard Madoff (free again, to ponzi more people)

9.Tax preparation (don’t do it, man..if none of us file they can’t get us all)

10.Patents (are cool, but hard to get)

i am telling daddy what is up!
he listens worse than a pup!
look daddy, i say
i am the alpha today!
i am a puppy and i run this place!
you are not, so get outta my face!

then i get a treat!


Tucker's take:

i am tucker. i am a puppy! this past few whiles, have been very fun for me. daddy and i have been together ALL.THE. TIME.

we have gone everywhere!

i went for a walk all around the block without a leash, with daddy of course, and daddy was so happy he gave me alot.
and alot.
and alots.
of treats!

i am working on a special post about a fun thing that daddy and i did with a couple other bloggererer friends. skippy mom, bouncin' barb (my bloggererer sis) and mynx-y...

it will be fun!
everything i do is  fun! i am a puppy! puppies have fun!
all.
the.
time!
i am quite the artist and funny puppy. you will love it. it is fun!

Daddy's take:

I have been stalking most of you as much as I can. I am sorry I may have missed a post here or there, but for the most part I read you guys and gals, and as much as possible, I leave a comment.

It seems as if Tucker has forgotten about his World Dogmanation quest for  this week, which is good. We have gone a lot of places and done many things. Most of them have been less than five minutes from the house, but thankfully a puppy has no real sense of time.

five minutes, three hours, meh, whatever..

Things for me have improved. I am getting a bit of stamina back. It is a day to day thing and some days are better than others.

Rock. the. fuck. on! BABY!

BTW, the TyckMonster is not lying, or stretching the truth, he has gone on several walks around the block with out a leash and I was even able to "down " him when he saw another dog. He wanted to go in the worst way.

He is deathly afraid of the noise the car keys make when rattled...he will drop like a lead ballon if i say down and rattle the keys. I keep them in my pocket so he does not know they are the car keys. I do not want him to associate going for a ride with that noise.

I will be having a very special guest on the Evil Twin Blog very soon...
The Empress from the Ranters Box and I are working on a very awesome piece...

Also I will be working on a special collabaoration with darling Mynx-y very soon...details to follow...

And, lastly, I have all the contest winners discs made up, I am just waiting getting som cash together to post them all out...i have not forgotten...

woofever!

flashback friday!

while i am on sabatical i am posting
some of the things i had in the hopper.
i know this says flashback friday
and it is sunday...
who's counting?
TRENDING NO!!!!TRENDING NOOOO!!!
1.Marisa Tomei (called me again, asking me out)
2.that guy we do not mention
3.that girl we do not mention
4.Renee Zellweger ( super hot)
5.Six Flags (seven poles)
6.Boeing 747-8 (flys great even drunk)
7.Chris Brown (lives downtown)
8.Fukushima reactor (prayers please)
9.Emergency kits (be prepared)
10.Tax deductions (I deducted all my imaginary kids this year…getting back a fortune!)



   

this week the JADIP blog is sponsored by

Brandon and Bryan

at

a beer for the shower

 

funny and well just flat out funny!

something is puzzling me...I know that is not a big surprise... if the box says now even better tasting or now with more flavor do you think they are just lying to us? It's okay to put that on dog food or cat food...cuz ANYTHING would be better than the dog food I have eaten...

or those cat treats...

damn tequila...

and remember Madge, "your soaking in it" whatever her name is? for Palmolive  dish detergent?

I do.

tonight as I was thinking about this post, I thought Palm Olive. for some reason it just sounded funny...Palm trees and Olive oil. Does not really seem  like a good combination for a cleaning product...IDK, but

It is Friday night.

When it was Friday afternoon I was all set to FRIDAY! and by Friday, I mean FRIDAY!!!! Like any Fridayer worth a damn, I came up with a plan. I laid out all the particulars to my wife cuz it is better to ask for permmission than beg for forgiveness...(Hint Hint)
   1. Finish up what I had going on. (what it was is unimportant)
   2. Get home and do some stuff. (no, this is not code for surf porn)
   3. Check out my blogs (some blog love to bouncin barb   kara first two followers of my EvilTwin
   4. Go See VoHo (you can read about who this is if you are new)
   5. Friday...(we'll see what happens...ya just never know)

Where and when this paricular Fridaying would end up no one knew.

That is the beauty of Fridaying.

ShitHappensWhenYouFridayNaked.

Yup.

I was ready to Friday til I was Purple and until the cows came home. Somewhere between plan and exectution my night turned south. I would not say it turned to shit, but it did not become a Friday for a Fridayer like me. It was more like a Monday... aside from the whiskey and cokes it was very much not Friday...

Don't get me wrong.

I am not upset or dismayed.

Oh contrarrer monfrraer...I am pleasntly buzzed, the TuckMonster is tucker'd and I am enjoying a third Canadian and Coke.AT HOME cuz..i sent a shout out to my peeps

seriously bruce? your peeps?

what a dumb expression, but i just HAD to use it. drinking and blogging...hummm....

I sent out an obligatory FRI.DAY.S.O.S...(friday Starting Out Sober)
oh my that sucks!

and got zero replies...

guess there was not much Friday in the group...

l.o.s.e.r.s!

I headed back toward the JADIPPalace and was going to find where the Friday was...I got thru stages 1-4. and quite sucessfully I might add. 

With no particular plan and all night to do it there was time...someone had to respond to my FRI.DAY.S.O.S...

     

In the mean time, I was hUngRy.HuNGry.HUngRy! and being so close to JP I figured I could Grub-n-Go...and this is where I lost my way.

This was where the Fridaying ended. 

I know you are thinking, that's awful! 

well, i gotta say nope. and here is why...

I decided to make a quick CW and C and reached into the FrozenTundraOfLambeauFreezer for some cubes and saw a site to behold. No...

I did not catch any ghosties sucking on ice cubes, but I did spy a frozen pizza...

Frozen pizza is an artform now days...

When I opened up the FrozenTundraOfLambeauFreezer and see Tuscan Chicken crispy crust Flat-bread all in one suculent sensational box. 

I kinda forgot my mission...

remember I was  hUngRy.HuNGry.HUngRy! and in order to satisfy this huNger, food must be involved. I have occasionnally often drank my dinner when I am Fridaying too much.

not tonight.

nope.

Writing about the alarm clock from hell may have casued the next series of grevious errors. I think the digital clocks in this house are communicating on some wierd wavelength and that could be a problem...

• pizza will cook in almost half the time if you set the oven to 550 F.
• it will not be cooked thru and thru, but the exterior will look more than done
• some may call this burnt     
• hittting the timer button repeatedly and the timer does not move up. that's a problem cuz...
• what is moving up is the oven temperature (Jus' Sayin')
• a cigarette from start to finish is just about the same time it takes for a pizza to go south...
• you cannot hear the timer when the TuckMonster is barking at something and the door is shut

eventhough i nearly experienced a near PizzaDizaster.... I survived...the OvenOverTemperature was averted and my drink did not spill...

all in all not to shabby...

Fridaying did not occur, on  a very grand scale, but worse things could happen...

I could be out of whiskey...being out of coke would just mean that I would have to drink it straight...

too bad its not tequila...

and you know what? 

this has really been bothering me...who gets the MutualFBFriends when a break up occurs. (not that i am going thru a break up...no, my wife will kill me mebbe but we are not going to break up...at least not today..)

It is bad enough with the choosing sides with all the REAL nearby friends, what is gonna happen to all the extended friendships? That was one thing that was pretty great during the mildly famous days when I got bored with someone, I just drove to the next town.

if they got bored with me???...

well THAT has NEVER happened...  

  it is not delivery it is digiorno or however the f they spell it...Whatever...it was good! 

it turns out my FRI.DAY.S.O.S... never got sent...

it went straight to draft

 guess my good-and-smart phone wasn't too good

or too smart...

or mebbe it was...

mebbe i was meant to NOT

FRIDAY!

   

My wife ended up being the Fridayer.

shes still not home...
i went to bed...

better sober up in case i have to go get her...

i hear SockPuppets