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Friday, September 3, 2010

On the Rodriguez…

     I have been on vacation for the past couple weeks. It was awesome…but like all good things it does come to an end. I had grand plans of writing several choice and awesome blogs to bring back to reality, but it seems that bass fishing and beer drinking got in the way of that plan…
Oh well…
     When I got back from vacation I worked a couple days and took another little trip…the shakedown cruise II of the BASSMONKEY was not all bad. A little boating and fishing at Tippy Dam. If you are wondering why I call my boat the BASSMONKEY, I guess you will have to read the blog and maybe I will remember to include the story of the…
This was the sign at the Tippy Dam outhouse…

     So I guess a toilet is not a place to put trash…SERIOUSLY???
    










I wrote one blog while on vacation…this is not it…it is on the other laptop and I am feeling a wee bit too lazy to go and do all the juxtapositions and gyrations that are required to fetch the document from the basement laptop…maybe tomorrow…
    




 I took this pic and found it to be oddly funny…

     The emergency stop has a tag to tell you not to remove it. It is also about thirty yards from the nearest gas pump…that is very SMRT!!!
     Those of you that follow me on FB know that I had a bit of luck catching…I also had a lot of luck fishing…the weather was fantastic and I was fishing solo most of the time so I did not have to whip out the “shut up and FISH” rule.

     After all that vacation and a couple of more days of work I am sitting down to relate the latest news of utmost importance…I am ON THE RODRIGUEZ….
     Before any of you thin-skinned, namby-pamby, PC, whiners out there get on your racist borax box…I mean no offense…I am a mutt of many nationalities and BTW…some of my best friends are people….
     It is kinda unfair,to be OTR because I ended up working rather late. have I ever mentioned I hate plumbing. If not let just say…I HATE PLUMBING!!!
     My friend Rich says that I came up with this OTR term, but in reality, if I did, I did it in a drunken stupor, kinda like the night I was captured on video showing Dennis how to dance. Yup…the WhiteMan’s overbite. Thank you Billy Crystal…sometimes when I am overserved, I do some pretty stupid things…I am just a you tube video waiting to happen…
     A couple of weeks ago, I was sitting on the Rich’s patio with Rich. We were discussing the upcoming Minnesota trip…In the background was the sailboat known as the SEAMONKEY. Back during the Mildly Famous days I lived on a sailboat. It was christened the SEAMONKEY. And during the christening, we managed to bend the shit out of the bow anchor pulley…you should all know that a bottle of champagne is hard enough to bend metal.
     You may want to know why the SEAMONKEY is in Rich’s yard. I sold it to him. If he did not buy it, it may have ended up in the possession of the IRS…but that is a story for another day, or maybe never. I hate the IRS even more than lawyers and bankstards…

BASSMONKEY…
     While we were plotting the trip, I mentioned that I would be flying solo the weekend of Labor Day…he replied, “oh yeah, you are on the Rodriguez…” I laughed…and asked him WTF did that mean. He replied that he had heard it from me. He went on to explain that anytime you are sans wife and kids it is AKA being On The Rodriguez…some people call it *batching it*…
Okay…
     Hey I found a moon rock in Minnesota…check it out…

     I know I come up with some wild stuff. I have a knack for walking the fine line of embellishment and outright lies. C’mon now, YOU know I don’t lie...for the life of me I do not remember slinging this phrase.
     So here I am OTR…until Monday at around five pm when the wife and kid come back…the world is my oyster. I have big plans. I’m gonna go fishing with the TuckMonster. I may get drunk. I may sleep in. I may stay up late. I will catch the MSU game.
     I may roll around on the floor with the TuckMonster, but that is no much different than any other day…it is still fun. BASSMONKEY…damn! I love my pup!!!
     I may not do anything. But there is no one to see me do it. Except the TuckMonster. But right now he is busy chewing on something. I do not know what, but I do not care. I am OTR…and life is good.
     I may get those old records off the shelf, crank up some Bob and do the Tom Cruise underwear dance, fighting visual complete with my wrap around, high def *as seen on TV* shades…that is not much different than any other day either…
     Hey, I may miss my family, but I also cherish the alone time. And the plans I make will all be accomplished. Or not. That is the beauty of OTR.
     Oh yeah…the BASSMONKEY…well, it is not an official name yet, but until I do come up with the name of my bass boat, I will borrow from my past, the SEAMONKEY…and insert it into the present…
     While I am OTR I may write a couple blogs…in the mean time I think I will *sink another drink, cuz it gives me time to think* and oh BTW….I missed you guys and gals…

Just another day in paradise