if you don like this speed...

The other day, or maybe it was a few years ago, I was sitting around doing nothing. I stayed in my pajamas all day. I watched some television. I ate some food. I drank some beer. Had a couple cocktails. I was lazy. Not that that is very hard to imagine, me, being lazy, but I was. I had the perfect slow day. It was a thing of beauty.

There is something that is just and right about a lazy day. We are all in a hurry all the time. We text, we call, and we twitter. Well, I don’t twitter. Something about the word twitter. I Brit I used to work with called people twits. Somehow when I think of twittering, I think of the people he would call twits. I agreed with most all of his opinions on those he called twits. It was an insult. I do not see myself twittering any time soon.

I only text if it is a matter of importance like life, death, insults, or beer. I text insulting remarks to my friends because it is fun. Much more so than insulting them in person. Well, not really. I still prefer face-to face time over the other means of communication. I have several templates designed to text important things like beer me, Mulligan’s, or Mancave Thursday.

Of course a template is a time saver. I can bank that time for the next slow day. Maybe even get in a 25 hour day. As you go slower time actually SEEMS to slow down. If I move slow enough I may discover the secret to time travel. Maybe. You just don’t know. I do not need to know that it is impossible. I do not need to know the physical improbabilities.

It seems to me our society is flying at breakneck speed. We can’t drive 55…We need to be in constant contact. Society needs a snow day. We only get one shot at life in this world. (as far as I know). Society needs a significant floating holiday. Or at least a half day. A friend of a friend used to say, “If you don’t like this speed you really won’t like the other one.” I use that almost daily. Almost as much as JADIP.

Yeah, I know that society needs to keep moving. Movers and shakers need to keep moving and shaking. You snooze you lose. Time waits for no man. Efficiency, productivity, and best practices, while important, do need to get a rest at some point. Even my laptop gets bogged down if I hyper click, run too many applications, or hit the wrong series of buttons. I would never be confused with a computer savvy person, I can, however, tell when the computer is over taxed when multi tasking. It shuts down. It freezes up. It takes a nap.

Recently I worked for a couple. They were both in wheel chairs. One was in the last stages of a terminal illness. The other was a double amputee. They were very upbeat. They were happy. You can be upset about your bad day, bad haircut, cold food, or any number of trivial things. You do not have to look very far to find some one who has it worse than you. You can rush through this life, hoping and praying that the next is better. Or…… you can slow down and beer me …..

Just another day in paradise