bathrooms

     I have two bathrooms in my house. One is for the guys, one is for the girls. Well, they are not labeled as such, but that is how it is. They both are full baths. The girls’ bath is on the main floor. The guys’ bath is in the basement.

     The girls bath has a 5 foot vanity with one sink, so there is lots of counter space. It has a tub/shower and a toilet, which seat and lid are always down. I don’t remember the actual color of the vanity top, because it is always cluttered with an assortment of lotions, soaps, mascara, fashion magazines, contact cases, and other things my wife and daughter use to put themselves together in the morning before they start their days. Stuff that has to be in full sight and at their fingertips, I presume to circumvent any and all beauty debacles.

     The one outlet has a power strip with all plugs filled with various heat assisted beauty devices. Flat irons, curing irons, and lord knows what else. I am sure the Eastern seaboard experiences brown-outs during the weekday mornings when both are preparing to face the day.

     There is also a full height linen closet cubically filled with other paraphernalia used by the girls. I should also mention the drawers and space under the cabinet are also filled with bathing and beauty supplies. I think I may have a toothbrush in this bathroom, but I am not quite sure.

     There are always several towels hanging on the bars, the shower door and hooks. These towels are the usable towels. There are also the decorative towels. These are never to be used. They are for show. Not that anyone would care to show the disaster that is this bathroom. But nonetheless they are there. They are right above the decorative soap that you can NEVER use, under any circumstances.

     The guys’ bath has by contrast has a shower, a towel hook, a towel bar, a wall mount sink, a corner medicine chest with three shelves and a total of 12 items on those shelves, and a throne. There is also a tool box next to the toilet. It holds tools. Not beauty tools, but pliers, channel locks, etc. and it doubles as a book case. I set it there when we moved in, to get it out of the way, and it has been there ever since. The only other thing in there is a free standing table with some reading material and a spare towel.

     A few weeks ago I used their toilet to relieve my bladder. I flushed. The toilet revolted and overflowed. I plunged the toilet and the clog went to the waste pipe Nether-regions. Amazingly there were NO towels in the bathroom to handle the overflow. No towels save the decorative ones. They no longer hang on the hook above the fancy decorative soaps. They soaked up the overflow quite nicely, and took their place in the trash can hall of fame. The second test flush eliminated those pesky decorative soaps as well.

Just another day in paradise