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Sunday, January 22, 2012

stupidiocracy...

the other day, on January 10th, as a matter of fact, I had an anniversary of sorts.

one year smoke and cancer free...

i know, not really like a big deal, people survive cancer all the time.

and people quit smoking everyday.

some by choice, some by death.

i have been back to work (sorta) for 3 months as of that day as well.

my plan to work has been changed. i started  a business to sell and manage construction jobs, but again find myself on job-sites more than i want to be, doing more than i prolly should, but i am making money.

my life has changed.

i am unable to do what i did before, like i did before. i cannot work  physically like i used to.

age has changed me.

illness has changed me.

BUT...
i still know how to balance a check book!

i have very little energy after the day is done.
but i still go and do what i can.
until i cannot do it anymore.
and pay the cost with a heating pad and self medication...

what else is there to do?
sit home and die?

and now i will may need to address my self-medication drinking habits.

kill.me.now.

i would rather have a  bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy, right?

fucking right!

so all that being said, on that day, i was on my way to a job site.

i see a school bus up ahead.

stopping at a driveway.

for.one.kid.

ok you say, it is rural america. that is the way it is.

i took a picture with my mind's-eye-mental-imaging-device...


see below:














and no i did not hit the school bus!
mebbe a little piece of me wanted to.

what you ask is wrong with that picture?
aside from my amateurish rendition?

someone drove their kid 100 yards to the bus stop.
let that settle in a bit...

100 yards...300 feet...

i walked a half mile or so, un-stupor-vised...it took us about 20 minutes.
(i googled it and by car it was 7 tenths of a mile, or 9 minutes drive time but we had short cuts...)
up hill both ways!
in the blinding snow!
Michigan summers are cold too!
year round!
cuz we used to roll like that!

and we had never lost a war back then!
('Nam was still going, but not yet considered a war, simply  a police action... and we all know there are no winners and losers in a police action...just like in AYSO)

mommy kept the car running...
so junior(ette)
would not get cold/lost/abducted/dead...

at the end of their fucking driveway.
more settling...
or unsettling...

and then drove back to their house.
100 yards away.
300 feet...
fuck-me-freddy...

the uberpussification of america starts at home.
the United States of America?
more like...

Ubberpussied Stupidiocracy of Asinine.

i would rather fight off zombies, biblical plagues, and douchecanoe terrorists, than deal with the next generation of kids that cannot handle walking 100 yards in Michigan winter.

to a bus stop...
at the end of the driveway.
of their own home...
three-fucking-hundred feet away...
visible from the picture window of your rural McMansion...

why not just drive your demonspawn to the school?
you would have used less fossil fuel.
and emitted less greenhouse gasses.


it is Michigan.
you live here.
it is cold and snowy
9 months a year
get the fuck used to it!

BTW, this year has been exceptionally mild.
temps in the 40's F
in January!

so anywhat...

if you are that stupidiotic...that  that you cannot dress your kids appropriately for the weather and trust that they can wander down the 100 yard driveway by themselves without:

a. getting hit by a car. (the thing that TAKES YOU EVERYFUCKIN'WHERE)
b. getting hit by the bus. (it's that big yellow thing that you ride on to get free day care an education) 
c. getting lost and/or freezing to death in 4 minutes. (better pack junior a lunch.)
d. getting nabbed by a rampant sexual predator biker gang. (cuz it happens ALL the time!)
e. all of the above. (we can only hope)

then...your contribution to the gene-pool is not needed.
what the fuck are we not teaching these kids?

these same kinda kids...
cross the street, not in the cross walk, without a care, in front you as you drive.
they then feel like you need to stop, cuz they have the right of way.
and then flip you off for nearly hitting them...
and have no idea that there are cross walks for a reason
except that they are for OTHER people
and do not know how to balance a check book, but have 12 years of math.

stupid as well as pampered...
unprepared.
idiotic.
entitled.
ridonkulous...

the Ubberpussied Stupidiocracy of Asinine.
next thing you know, they will be cancelling school for a wind advisory...
not a hurricane, or tornado...
just strong winds.

cuz little johnny's ball cap, that he wears cocked sorta sideways or sorta backwards may blow off and he will get brain damaged by flying squirrel shit.

jus sayin.


opinionflash...
he is already there...

yeah, there are prolly a hundred good reasons for someone to be that overprotective.
i cannot think of one.

mebbe it is just me.
you know, hard-assed, lard-assed, uncaring bastage, that i am.

not every kid is a winner.
they all do not deserve a medal.
the world is made up of winners and losers.
some people ARE losers.
some kids will not excel at anything, save for mouth-breathing incompetency.

i am thankful that i will not be alive long enough to watch as the Ubberpussied Stupidiocracy of Asinine completes the transformation and we get our asses handed to us by the rest of the world that has prepared its offspring for a modicum of adversity.

and checkbook balancing.

see ya soon!

it is, afterall,
Just Another Day In Paradise
and i am
Just Another Dog In Puppydise

15 comments:

  1. Congrats on the 1 year milestone Lil Bro! So good to hear from you. Glad to hear you started doing your own thing. Maybe you will get to a point where someone else can do the b.s. stuff and you can just oversee it. That's my hope for you anyway. Totally agree about the kids! The bus stop was a great experience for us growing up. It was a hike too. Now it's door to door service because the parents don't want to get out of their warm houses or cars and have to watch their kids for a few minutes each day. Great post!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Gosh Bruce...I almost fell off my chair I was laughing so hard! That was brilliant! Really! Just Brilliant! Man, I needed that laugh. Sad thing though, it hits the truth button as I've been witness to such stupidity in my neck of the woods too! Seem Michigan isn't the only place where inbreeding rears its ugly head.

    On to another note...Congratulations on the one year milestone. Big Hugs to you for overcoming adversity and still having your wickedly wild sense of humour intact. (Which is so prevalent in this post)

    I'm happy to read you are back at work but do take it easy...I want you around for a long, long time - I count on your view of the world to keep me balanced! Cheers, Jenny.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Thats great that you've got over some mile stones, to some its probably nothing but to you its good to be here even if its smoke free.

    As for the kid... well doesn't surprise me at all. Its something we talk about at work. How the children just live over the school wall and parents are late to collect them or bring them to school in the car driving a longer way around because its raining/snowing which causes unnecessary traffic... so annoying! You can't even take kids on school trips anymore without them complaining they are tired or when is it time to eat...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. we definitely make it too easy to to be lazy.

      and i hate traffic jams created by dropping and picking up the little monsters...

      Delete
  4. Congrats on your anniversary (of sorts) as both are no small milestone! :)

    I have more than a couple parents who do the same exact thing in the neighborhood I nanny in. Granted the kids I nanny for get picked up at the end of their short driveway since there are no sidewalks in their area so I don't have to walk far or wait outside long...but I can't imagine driving to the end of a driveway for a bus. The kids will freaking live! They still go out for recess they can hop around for a few minutes until the bus arrives. I walked to school everyday from elementary school through high school and while my elementary school was close my high school was 1.6 miles away (should have been bused but apparently they measure distance "as a crow flies" and though my mother insisted I couldn't fly they really didn't care). Anyway...point is I lived...I was just fine even though I had to walk through shady ass parks and back woods neighborhoods. Kids today are total freaking wimps.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yes they are...

      uberpusies...
      we are raising a generation of sugar coated uberpussies!

      Delete
  5. Congrats on the year anniversary... a great achievement

    The school thing made me laugh...some people have a mixed up way of living.
    It made me think of Cuba - where by law every child must have an elementary school within a 15 minute walk of their home...so you see these little schools everywhere.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hooray for your healthy report card! kudos to your lungs!
    getting stuck behind the busses [which used to let kids take chances walking across the street] which take like 45 minutes to pick up 10 kids over a 1 mile stretch reallly gets my goat.
    now where is my goat?!?
    grrr,
    v

    ReplyDelete
  7. Has it really been only a year? Oh the time has flown by so fast and I am so proud of all you have achieved in the last year. I know how difficult it has been for you at times.
    Give tucker a cuddle from me and you know where to find me when you want a chat.
    HKCN & T Sir Bruce

    ReplyDelete
  8. Drink might not kill you [and thank you jeebus that cancer didn't] but you may just stroke out over stressing out about what strangers do with their kids. And that's no fun! :D

    For what it is worth [and for every ONE parent that drives their kid 300 ft] there are plenty of parents that make their kids walk pretty darn tootin' far to the bus stop, regardless of the weather. Due to budget cuts bus stops are very few and far between in our little suburb of the US as I suspect they are everywhere.

    Glad to see you are so busy at work. Hopefully you will build up more strength as more time passes, but it is nice to see that you count it as the blessing that it is. I bet you and the Tuckman can't wait for fishin' season to get here! :)

    Enjoy the "nice" weather.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Congrats on your anniversary.

    It's a given that stupid shit like that happen all over, not just in Michigan. I can see driving a young child to school 'cause of the sick fucks that populate the planet, but driving someone down the end of the driveway 100 feet is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too much pampering (although I would recommend using Luvs instead).

    ReplyDelete
  10. Awesome milestone! I think you deserve a tipple or two just for that. ;-) As for the pussification of the younger generation, I couldn't agree more. What gets me are when school bus stops are one block apart - for many blocks. No wonder these kids never get exercise.

    ReplyDelete

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